In the decade that Lotta Dann has been alcohol-free, she's seen a sea change in attitudes towards people choosing not to drink.
Her website Living Sober is a free and friendly place for people going booze-free to connect with others on the same path.
Lotta Dann Photo: CATHERINE CATTANACH 2020
"We're just people who struggle with alcohol or are struggling with alcohol who come together in this space to talk to each other," she tells Jesse Mulligan.
- Related: Free to be alcohol-free - a collection of RNZ stories about people choosing not to drink
Ten years ago, when Dann was feeling very alone with her drinking problem she saw very few visible non-drinkers and heard little discussion about alcohol being an addictive drug.
Now it's a different story.
'Even around our campsite, people are sitting in their deck chairs having conversations about their relationship with alcohol. That just wasn't done before so I'm really heartened by that."
Everyone's journey is very different, she says, so if cutting back alcohol works for you rather than cutting it out, go for it.
Moderation wasn't an option for her, though.
"I tried and tried and tried… and in the end, I had to accept that I just couldn't moderate. Other people do manage to cut back and have a really casual relationship with the stuff."
The path to not drinking or less drinking is different for every individual, and no one style of support group is right for everyone.
"What you want to hear, who you want to connect with is different. So you've gotta cast around until you find the right fit for you to help you do what it is you're trying to do."
When changing your relationship with alcohol, it's really helpful to reach out to people doing the same thing so you can empathise and commiserate with each other, she says.
But a lot of the answers can only come from within.
"You are the only person who really knows the truth of what's really going on with your drinking habits so stay honest with yourself."
Dann says she's now almost grateful for her drinking problem as giving it up made her have to dig deep.
And with sobriety, every single aspect of her life has improved.
"My connections with my family, my health, my appearance… my career has certainly gone in a completely different and, to my mind, fabulous direction but the main thing is my connection with myself.
"I had no idea who I was, what I liked, what I didnt like, how to comfort myself. I didn't know that I was a very watery person with a deep sadness inside me that I've now made peace with and become friends with. There was so much that I had masked with this nightly wine habit that at first, it was uncomfortable but now… I feel really grounded and connected to who I am."
When a habitual drinker gives up alcohol, some of the benefits take a while to emerge, Dann says, but the quality of your sleep should improve quite quickly.
'Then you start getting these lovely hangover-free wakeups where you just feel calm… the morning is so good."
Journalist Guyon Espiner explores New Zealand's drinking culture and gets personal about quitting the booze himself in the documentary PROOF:
